Crying is not the end of the world.

I recently received a complimentary copy of a book from a publisher. It was about getting kids to eat without crying. I don’t know if they expected me to blog about it, but much of what I read in there was against my own methods/beliefs. I’m not naming the book because I don’t want to put the author down (after all, she is trying to get kids to eat well) or say that there aren’t many valid points, but I just don’t see what’s so awful about crying occasionally.

Of course, we don’t want our kids to cry. For one it grates on our nerves, but also we don’t like having our kids distressed. I just won’t give in to the cries over a dish just to make them stop. It sets a precedent—they’ll learn to cry to get out of things they don’t want to do or like, even if it’s good for them. I don’t try to make my kids cry (remember, I don’t like to hear it) but I just don’t avoid it. I want them to eat well. If they cry because they don’t like what they’re served without even trying it— well, sorry, that’s the meal and that’s what we’re eating. It’s not like I’m a hard ass all the time. I will often make them meals that they love and do try to please them. I want my kids to be happy. I just think sometimes people are so afraid of crying that they’ll do anything to avoid it— similarly giving in to the food battles just to get them to eat. If they’re really hungry they will eat. If they would just stop crying and try the food, they might find that they like it.

Now what I do do is make healthy and tasty foods. I know most of the time that they will enjoy it if given a chance to taste it. It happens most often with my middle son. I don’t know why he continues to cry when he sees a dish that is new to him and he thinks he won’t like, but he does. He will cry for a little time, realize that we’re not budging (as in making him an alternative meal) and then eat. So often to the bottom of the bowl or until his plate is clean. And when he’s eaten— he’s happy. No signs of having been upset left over from the beginning. I love it when they enjoy their meal.

So, don’t worry about an occasional tear. Do the right thing by them and teach them to eat healthfully. They’ll be better for it than if they’re given whatever they want to eat. Look at these statistics. And, they will learn to stop crying (eventually) and just try other means of getting out of things.